Some questions I had while watching “The Avengers”

At La Grolla.  #Snapseed

As I mentioned yesterday, last night for our anniversary (which is today – happy anniversary, PM!), we went to see The Avengers (we also went to La Grolla for dinner, which was awesome. The photo above shows our dessert).

Now, don’t get me wrong. The movie was a lot of fun. A lot. But I still have some questions. Like:

  1. When Loki was staging his little distraction at the opera (or whatever) in Stuttgart, and he gives (one of) his speech(es) about how freedom is oppressing us all, and he demands that the crowd kneel to him, why is this speech given in English? In the opening scene with Black Widow and the Russian mobsters, they all talked Russian, so it’s not like a case of, well, those Americans hate subtitles. And surely a demi-god / alien of his caliber would know German, no?
  2. If Thor and Loki – ancient Norse gods / aliens / whatever – are going to speak English while on Earth (even to each other, and even when nobody else is around), why do they sound like in-character Renaissance fair-goers, complete with stilted formalities and vaguely-English-sounding accents? (Perhaps this was discussed in Thor?)
  3. Black Widow and Hawkeye – they’re just, like, regular (spy) people, right? No super-human powers, no magic suits?
  4. Does the serum or whatever it was that turned Captain America into Captian America also give him a perennially close shave? All the other dudes in the movie seemed to have varying degrees of facial hair, but Captian America’s face was like a baby’s butt up there.
  5. Spoilers after the jump – you’ve been warned!

  6. Am I supposed to know who the mega-bad guy alien at the very end (after the credits) was? Is he in the comics? I feel like was missing something there. Who is he? You can tell me; I like being spoiled.
  7. Agent Coulsen isn’t really dead, right? Not that I couldn’t handle it or anything – I don’t know enough about the universe to be that attached to him (although every time I see him I still think, “Special Agent Casper!” and I mentally thank him for his service to President Bartlet), and, after all, this is Joss Whedon we’re talking about, so I was fully prepared for a beloved character to die. But – we never saw his body after Fury said the medics took him away; there was no funeral or anything; I gather Fury plays fast and loose with the truth when it serves him …I’m just sayin’.

There was other stuff I didn’t quite get, like what exactly was Hawkeye doing when Loki pulled the stunt in Stuttgart (I gather he was stealing irradium or something, but was he in Germany, too? Were the goods near the opera house? Why did he need somebody’s eyeball?), but I think most of my confusion arose because things were happening too quickly for me to follow.

Again, the movie was enjoyable. And, while it didn’t pass the Bechdel test (I don’t think there were two female characters who talked to each other at all, let alone talked to each other about something other than men), I appreciated the relatively strong female characters. It was a fun summer movie, and I recommend it. I nit-pick because I love.

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